Powerful dark feminine energy traits.
A woman strong in dark feminine energy traits is unapologetic in the power of her sex, ferocity, and instincts.
A woman empowered in dark feminine energy traits has embodied the power of the taboo woman.
She is oozing with sensuality and erotic power. She is sexually sovereign, and she knows a deep sense of full-body, full-being pleasure. She has a deep respect for who she is, what she wants, and what she needs. She trusts her anger and instincts. She refuses to dim her heart, she refuses to dim her truth, and she refuses to dim her glory. She will never sacrifice her truth to make another comfortable. She is vivacious and ravenous for life. She relishes in her body and the moment, and she knows joy.
Most women sense the dark feminine within them. She is alive within all of us. She is an innate part of our feminine energy, but she is often quiet beneath the surface, afraid, unsure, or timid to fully come online and lead.
Women need the dark feminine to thrive.
3 months rooted in erotic enlivenment, somatics, shadow work, and pleasure.
When we look at the different ways that our dark feminine energy traits are suppressed and yearning, it can help us better track where we are in need.
The yearning, the aches, and the longings are where we are being beckoned to fan the flames.
Below are various pains, confusion, and experiences that are begging for our dark feminine energy traits to come online —
The many veins of sexual grief – heartbreak, relationships ending, infidelity, lies, betrayal – by both men and sisters. Slut shaming. The navigation of fertility, STIs, pelvic pain, and hormonal and gynecological factors that are hijacking sexual experiences, emotional intimacy, and our sense of worth. Bad sexual experiences that have left you shut down, unable to tap into your genuine current without being reactionary to another.
Women’s initiations of motherhood, postpartum, perimenopause, and the changing of our bodies, relationships, or relationship dynamics, and life.
The navigation of one’s sexual identity.
Sexual dissatisfaction, sexual longing, sexual shame, and sexual repression.
A dissoance between one’s heart and pussy.
Sexual fawning – having sex when you don’t really feel like it, saying yes when you mean no, and no when you want to say yes. Hiding how you really feel, and to some extent putting on a show to please and serve, or to feel emotionally protected.
Desiring to be desired, wanted, and chosen more than pleasure itself.
Fear of abandonment overpowers the honor of your truth
Mean girl, dark feminine manipulation.
Facing women we can’t trust, or being a woman whom others don’t trust.
Being the one who betrays, seduces for power, competes with other women, and feeds off men.
Meek.
Afraid of anger, afraid of confrontation, afraid of aggression.
Timid of our power.
Strayed from our instincts.
3 months rooted in erotic enlivenment, somatics, shadow work, and pleasure.
Putting others' sensitivities over our own.
Struggles with money.
Highly empathetic, compassionate, and forgiving, always able to see with divine eyes, understand, forgive, and let go to a fault.
Spiritual maturity that doesn't allow the messiness of untamed emotional expression and purging.
The visionary, who dreams, and dreams, and dreams, but nothing ever can quite come through to fruition.
The spiritual mystic who lives in the etheral dissociated from her body, the present, physical pleasure, action, and manifestation.
The woman who is fixated on her body — her weight, cellulite, wrinkles, curves, sagginess, flaps, folds, shape, size, what she eats, and how she looks.
The starved woman who doesn’t give her hunger permission – in food, in emotionality, and in life.
The woman who looks at herself and sees her flaws and weaknesses. She looks in the mirror and doesn’t see an intelligent, beautiful, empowered woman, she sees a young girl in a woman’s body who is somehow flawed and less capable than she thinks she should be.
The woman who constantly compares herself to other women.
The woman who feels like an impostor in her power and wisdom – like she doesn’t know enough, isn’t intelligent enough, experienced enough, isn’t healed enough, isn’t able enough. She believes someone else always knows better, is more capable, and is more worthy to claim what she has every right to claim.
The woman who feels like an impostor in her sexuality – like she is forcing it, performing, hiding the reality of her desires, or dissatisfaction, or disconnection to herself or her partner.
The woman who has no libido but wants to want sex more than anything.
The woman who feels this erotic energy raging inside of her, but she doesn’t feel safe to let it out, or is overwhelmed by the thought of lifting the flood gates in fear of what she will do, how she will be perceived, judged, and how it will affect her relationships.
3 months rooted in erotic enlivenment, somatics, shadow work, and pleasure.
The woman who was/is religiously shamed of her body and sexuality, or her mother, grandmothers, and other women have passed this on, and she can’t shake it.
The woman who doesn’t know how to embody her sexuality, sensuality, and erotic energy without alcohol – intimacy with others is always in the scene of intoxication.
The woman who is in a polyamorous relationship who wants monogamy, the one who is in a monogamous relationship but wants it to be open, the one who is having sex but doesn’t want to, and the one who isn’t having sex but dying to.
The woman who struggles to orgasm.
The woman whose voice is stuck – in sex, in conflict, in self-expression, and all of life.
The one who is uncomfortable allowing herself permission to be a type of woman she doesnt typically let herself embody even though she secretly longs too whether that be the girly girl, dressed up, with make up, and more fashionable clothes, slutty cloths, skin and cleavage showing, or whether it’s going out with no make up, no adornment, or being feral, and unshaved.
The woman torn between the madonna-whore split in their world of identities grappling with the tension – can I be the whore and the mother? Can I be the whore and professional? Can I be the whore and the nun/priestess? Can I be a whore and not have sex with anybody or everybody? Can I be the whore and be ultra conservative, hiding my body, modest, prudent, and respect my tight boundaries and comfort that are genuinely how I feel?
The woman who wonders if she could be a bitch, in her rage, and spew her truth of bitterness and resentments, and still be loved and unabandoned?
The woman who feels this internal nagging, weight, or this gaping hole that she doesn’t know how to address/access/fix/heal, and she puts a huge amount of pressure on herself to sexually awaken or heal, or to access her rage, but can feel herself holding her breath trying to ignore her longing for more, to let go, and to go deeper.
The woman who feels stagnant and has a strong sense that there is something that she isn’t tapping into.
The woman who wants to show up sexually, emotionally, professionally, creatively, or socially in a certain way, and her identity as a woman feels disempowered. She feels broken, or like she isn’t accessing something that is available.
The woman who has this pressure, this voice, this self-shame, or beckoning that is constantly there, no matter how subtle or grand.
The woman who feels a sense of meekness, heaviness, and flatness in energy and spirit, and maybe does, or doesn’t, realize there is a lack of joy that she wants more of.
The woman who senses a well of rage she doesn’t dare touch.
The woman who doesn’t know pleasure, or sensuality that is for her and her pleasure only (if at all).
The woman whose sexuality has an ulterior motive – wanting love, wanting to satiate another, wanting to be wanted, desirable, and lovable, or to be seen in a certain way that feels powerful. It's not a pure desire to simply experience the pleasure or joy of it.
The woman who doesn’t feel confident with assertiveness, boundaries, anger, and conflict, and is consumed with people pleasing, not wanting to trigger others or make them uncomfortable, is a caretaker, and self-sacrifice is a virtue.
The woman who is tapped into this ferocity of assertion and aggression, but it's shadowy, isolating, hard, and cold.
The woman who longs to feel confident and comfortable to embody more sensuality and sexual energy unabashedly. She wants to ooze with it. She wants to genuinely feel it. The high of it.
3 months rooted in erotic enlivenment, somatics, shadow work, and pleasure.
The woman who longs to feel sexually enlivened. She is lusting to know more pleasure and joy. She aches to be unwavering in her confidence and power.
The woman who longs to be unapologetic and shameless.
The woman who is more conservative, or more of a slut than she is allowing herself to be.
The woman who is more bitchy and rash, or emotional and sensitive than she is lets on.
The woman who feels dissonance between how she wants to feel and how she actually feels and it’s making her feel fucking crazy.
The woman who wants more. Period. She wants all of it.
This is one of the most powerful dark feminine energy traits there is.
The woman who wants more fire. Feminine fire – that juicy, luscious, and fierce fire. Sensuous, pleasure-filled, not giving any fucks kind of fire.
No matter what social circles we run with and stories we hold, there is an idolized version of woman.
Dark feminine energy traits are less about how the qualities of our sex, fire, and unapologeticness appears — it’s how it feels.
It’s about feeling liberated in the authentic embodiment of our sex, our fire, and our truth.
The thing is, is that we can often sense the embers of this dark feminine power within us, but we don’t know how to go there. We don’t know how to let go. We don't know how to give it permission, in heart and body. There’s too much dissonance. Too much story. Too much imprinting cognitively and in our nervous systems that are blocking us from seeing and embodying what’s available and possible.
Bringing these dark feminine energy traits online is a process of releasing the pressure valve of expectation and freeing ourselves because the embers of what we want are already crackling inside.
It’s simple and it’s not. We can know exactly what we need, we can know exactly where we want to go, how we want to feel, how we want to be embodied, and what we want to feel, but it’s a process. These fears, inhibitions, and disconnects in energy and embodiment are wired deep in the collective psyche and experience of woman, and they are wired deep in our nervous system.
If any of this is you, in its own odd, contradictory mix, what would it feel like to dismantle all of it, and to be blessed and set free by the fires of the dark feminine and the erotic within?
Women rich with dark feminine energy traits have a greater capacity for joy, pleasure, love, and aliveness – and if that’s not empowerment, what is?
If you would like to step into a sacred container to do this work, and be touched by the dark feminine fires of liberation I have created Pussy Fire – A Dark Feminine Awakening of Erotic Enlivenment for just this. It is one of my most dear and precious offerings to reclaim the power of our body, heart, and eros as women.
3 months rooted in somatics, shadow work, pleasure + the activation of 6 dark feminine archetypes.
There is so much wounding around the sexualization of pleasure and women, the demonization of the dark feminine, and the entanglement between sexuality, pleasure, and the erotic; it’s no wonder this energy can be so challenging and hard to genuinely embody.
If you would like to dip your toes — read the blogs linked above for a deeper dive, or join my freebie offering of 7 days of sexual healing below.
Regardless, blessings on your journey.
With marigold love,
Abby
